The Weight of Knowing

The Weight of KnowingWhy identity cannot be outsourced to algorithms I was wondering… what happens when we begin to let machines hold the chisel that carves our identity?

Identity isn’t a fixed thing. It is something continually carved - shaped and reshaped through memory, relationships, choices, our struggle with the Unknown, and the stories we tell about ourselves. For centuries, philosophers and psychologists have shown how each of these forces makes us who we are: memory, relationships, choices, the Unknown, narratives.

Memory. English philosopher John Locke argued that memory gives us personal continuity - the thread that binds who we were yesterday to who we are today. Without memory, coherence collapses. But memory is now quietly offloaded: our phones recall where we’ve been, our clouds hold our archives, our devices remind us who we are. When memory is outsourced, the carving of self is no longer entirely in our hands.

Relationships. But memory alone is not enough to sustain identity. American sociologist Charles Horton Cooley described the “looking-glass self,” where we come to know who we are through the mirror of others. Today those mirrors are mediated by platforms and algorithms. Belonging, recognition, and identity itself are filtered through engagement metrics and virality. When we hand these mirrors to machines, we risk becoming less human and more curated.

Choices. Still, identity is not only remembered or reflected - it is authored through choice. Philosophers like Charles Taylor and Sartre argued that we become ourselves through the values we act on, the commitments we make. Yet increasingly, algorithms make choices on our behalf: curating our tastes, recommending our paths, even suggesting our partners. What becomes of identity when agency erodes, when we no longer carry the burden of choosing?

The Unknown. And beyond memory, mirrors, and choices lies something deeper. Austrian neurologist and philosopher Viktor Frankl reminded us that meaning is not handed to us, but born in how we confront suffering, uncertainty, and the Unknown. Identity is not only built from what we know, but from how we face what we cannot know. Cognitive offshoring tempts us to avoid this struggle - to seek instant certainty instead of wrestling with ambiguity. But it is at the edge of the Unknown where identity is carved, and where meaning is forged.

Narrative. Finally, all of this is bound together by story. American psychologist Dan McAdams calls this the “narrative identity” - the story we tell and retell about ourselves, weaving memory, relationships, choices, and struggle into coherence. But today, identity risks becoming fragmented: one story for LinkedIn, another for Instagram, another for TikTok. When algorithms stitch these fragments for us, the carving of self is no longer authored, but automated.

Every act of cognitive offshoring saves us effort. But it costs us authorship.

For leaders, the temptation is profound. Dashboards flatten complexity. Metrics promise clarity. Systems offer the comfort of certainty. But leadership has never been about efficiency only. Leadership has always been about character. Aristotle reminded us that the essence of leadership lies not in outcomes only, but in the cultivation of judgment, responsibility, and virtue. To confuse engine recommendations with wisdom is to flatten the very qualities leadership requires.

We need to recognise that the Unknown cannot be outsourced.

To lead is to wrestle with what cannot be calculated. To live inside ambiguity. To sit with what is incomplete and undecidable - and still take responsibility for a choice. Identity is carved at the edge of the Unknown, where meaning is born. To surrender this struggle is not just to abandon leadership. It is to abandon ourselves.

As American sociologist Sherry Turkle observed decades ago, technology doesn’t just reshape what we do - it reshapes who we are.

So let me ask you this: How much of your thinking did you actually do today? And how much was delegated to a machine?

This is where Knowledge Mindfulness becomes vital.

It asks leaders to:

• Label what is shaping your knowing. Treat information like nutrition. Notice what you’re consuming, and how it carves your identity.
• Balance connection and disconnection. Don’t let machines decide whose voices define you. Identity is carved in dialogue, not in algorithmic echo chambers.
• Align choices with values. Data may tell you what works, but it cannot tell you what matters. Identity is carved by the commitments we make and live out, not the defaults we accept.
• Reclaim authorship. Don’t let algorithms stitch fragments into your story. Identity is carved as a tapestry - woven from knowing, being, doing, and the Unknown.
• Embrace the Unknown. Resist the urge to outsource every answer. Sit with uncertainty long enough for discernment to emerge. The Unknown is not weakness - it is the crucible where meaning and responsibility are refined.

To be human is not to know everything, but to wrestle with the Unknown. Offshoring this struggle is not just outsourcing thought - it is offshoring our humanity.